I've been applying for a co-op for about eight months now. As of right now I've sent out more than 280 applications, all across Canada. I wanted to write this down because most of what I read online about the job search is either a highlight reel or a "10 tips to land your dream internship" post, and neither one really describes what it's actually like day to day.

The silence

The hardest part isn't even the rejections. It's the silence. You apply, and then nothing. No rejection, no "we'll keep your resume on file," nothing. You just sit there wondering if your resume got read by an actual person or if it disappeared into some system. That waiting makes you nervous in a way that's hard to explain unless you're in it.

The interviews

When I do get an interview, a different kind of anxiety shows up. Sometimes I walk in already convinced I don't deserve to be there, like the interview is going to expose that I'm not ready. And then there are the interviews where the interviewer seems genuinely excited, says things that sound like a yes, and you still don't get the job. I had one or two interviews where the actual reason was something as simple as not having a driver's license. The rest, I honestly have no idea why I didn't get them, and that's its own kind of frustrating, because I don't know what to fix before the next one.

The part I don't say out loud

There's something underneath all of this that's harder to write about. I know what my parents are doing for me, what they're giving up so I can be here. Classes are still going the whole time, and some days I do great and some days I don't, and there are nights I can't sleep because I'm thinking about what more I could be doing, what's even expected of me at this point. There's this feeling that the sacrifice on their end and what I actually have to show for it right now don't match up, and that's not a feeling you can just turn off. But at the same time, I remind myself I'm here, I'm doing my best, and I put myself out of my comfort zone instead of just staying home where it would have been easier. I don't know if that's the right way to look at it. I honestly don't know.

The technical part

A lot of my projects right now get built quickly with AI helping me move fast, which has been great for having stuff to show. But it shows up as a gap in technical interviews. When someone asks me to actually work through a problem live, that's a different skill than reading and understanding AI-generated code, and I can feel the difference in the room.

What I've actually tried

  • Tailoring my resume for every job, not just swapping the company name.
  • Building more projects to have more to show.
  • Cold emailing people and trying to build real connections, which has actually been going well. People have been more open to talking than I expected. The hard part is turning "let's connect" into "can you help me get a job." That jump is awkward no matter how you phrase it.
  • Checking the UPEI co-op job board, which barely has 2 or 3 postings up at a time. I don't fully get why, since it's supposed to be one of the main resources for this.

Where things are right now

I don't have any interviews lined up at the moment. But thanks to Ron Myers, the CEO of the PEI IT Alliance, I've been spending time at The Foundry, working and meeting people there. I'm hoping something comes out of that.

I don't have a clean ending for this post because I'm still in the middle of it. I just wanted to write down what eight months and 280 applications actually feels like, since most of what I read before I started this search made it sound a lot easier than it's been.